'Twas the night before christmas In Neo-Detroit Not a creature was stirring Not even John Voight.
The holster was hung By the windown with pride In hopes that Ole Robocop soon would be there
The crim'nals were nestled In corners and nooks While visions of vengance were vexing those crooks And I, in my PJ's and Jess in her slacks Had just settled down for a night to relax
When out in the alley there was such a clatter I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter Outside, through the window i witnessed a flash And heard a gunshot like a terrible blast
The moon lit a scene that was beyond belief A broken down junkie was mugging a priest!
When what, to my wondering eyes should be seen? But a cop on a unicorn, part man, part machine. His chrome pieces glistened, lighting up the night And the junkie's eyes lit up too, this time in fright.
The gun on his side, it was also reflective And he whistled and shouted out his prime directives Now, Serve! Now, Protect! Now Uphold the law! With a flash, his gun fire, and what i then saw Will haunt me for life should i live to be eighty The junkie was filled up with holes and the greatly Relieved priest went down upon his knees to pray But Robocops eyes twinkled as tho' to say
"Once i was a man not unlike you are now And although i can not quite remember just how I became what i am, i know that it's my place To protect folks who need it, keep everyone safe So there's no need to thank me, it's just what i do Trying to show the law's there for people like you"
And back on the unicorn he sprang like a vole And was off to continue patrol And I heard him exclaim as he rode out of sight
Merry "Robocop on a Unicorn", and too all a good night!